Where are you?
In a non slutty way
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
