i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize