it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize