Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
