dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
did i just pee glitter
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
