alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
