Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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