I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
she smelled like a LAN party
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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