oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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