Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
