Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
