Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
