I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
