At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
