Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i dont even know how to be here
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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