well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
