WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize