You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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