i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
