dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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