What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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