It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
