erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize
