Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I believe in your delicious
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Randomize
