love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
