Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize