Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
