great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
