I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
