I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize