i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
