There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
