got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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