i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
