More tranny stories later!
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize