Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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