I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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