we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
