Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Come back. Shots need mouths.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize