You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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