i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize