Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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