thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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