OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
