So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
