i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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