Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
How external is "for external use only"?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
