Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
