So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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