Fuck appropriateness.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just high enough for therapy.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
