your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
